I was surfing around the internet and happened across an article that spells out what the author feels makes a man a man. Just for the hell of it, I started looking around at some other similar articles. This inspired me to create my own list. For the record, this is my list. It is not copied nor pasted.
One thing that I should mention here (as the question has arisen on more than one occasion). I use the term “his woman” a number of times in this text. I use this term strictly as a generic term to identify the woman who is in his life as his mate (girlfriend, wife, etc.). It is not meant to imply ownership, any more than the terms “his mom”, “his brother”, “his best friend”, etc. would.
Here it is:
- A man knows that his ego is both his sword and his shield, and he has no business using it against his woman or his children.
- A man keeps his word… always. If there is a chance that he cannot keep it, he doesn’t give it.
- A man gets the door without even thinking about it.
- A man knows what makes him who is, and will not compromise those standards for anyone.
- A man knows that everything else is open to negotiation
- A man gives more than he receives, because he likes giving, not because he expects anything in return.
- A man is strong. He does what he must because it must be done, and he does not complain about it.
- A man will protect those that he loves, at all costs, without hesitation.
- A man quietly gathers his strength from the love that he feels for those around him.
- A man knows when it is best to just keep his mouth shut (that one is really hard for me).
- A man fixes things or builds things as the need arises.
- A man knows when fixing or building something is beyond his ability, and gets help (yea, I have a problem with that one).
- A man will feed his woman, his kids, his mother, and his dog, even if doing so means he must go hungry.
- A man sets a positive example for children – all children, not just his own.
- A man knows that, at any time, he may have to turn off the TV to take his woman shoe shopping, or his kids to their recital and is okay with that.
- A man knows when to stop drinking.
- A man can cook. He does not need to be a chef, but he can turn whatever is sitting in the fridge into something resembling a meal.
- A man is not afraid to tell those that he loves that he loves them, nor does he feel a “need” to tell them. He may choose to tell them, but they already know.
- A man does not make excuses for his actions. Good or bad, he owns them and takes full responsibility for them.
- A man does not pretend to know something that he does not to try to look smart.
- A man does not pretend… anything.
- A man will do everything in his power to be prepared for any eventuality.
- A man knows that he must be dependable.
- A man does not hold a “list”. Deeds are forgiven, or they are not. If they are forgiven, the deed is never spoken of again. If they are not, the person is never spoken to again.
- A man knows that almost all deeds are forgivable.
- A man earns respect by the things he does, he does not need to demand it.
- A man treats others with respect.
- A man demands more from himself than he does from others.
- A man knows that most battles are not worth fighting, so he carefully chooses those that are, and will fight them to the death (if it is not worth dying for, it is not worth fighting for).
- A man does not engage in battles with his woman, his children, his mother, or his dog (had to throw the dog in there).
- A man knows when to be strong, when to be loving, when to be wise, and when to be funny, and can be any of them when the opportunity calls for it.
- A man looks for the positive side of any given situation, so that he can make the most out of it.
- A man does not dwell on mistakes (his or others’). He learns from them and moves on.
- A man does not try to change his woman. He loves her as she is.
- A man does not allow his woman to change him, but will still do his best to accommodate her whenever possible in the interest of making her happy.
- A man has impeccable hygiene.
- A man may have many wants, but his needs are few.
- A man looks at other women for the beauty they posses (we can’t help it), but would never think of being with anyone but his woman.
- A man is simple.
- A man is trustworthy.
Did I forget anything? I am sure that I did. There may be some people who will want to turn this into a gender stereotype discussion, and if that is what you want to do that is fine. Yes, there are some of these traits that both men and women should probably share, but I am a man, and the last thing I would ever do is presume to tell a woman what she should or should not do.
Also, this is not some kind of “hey girls, look at me, I am all these things”. In fact, I do not claim to have any of these traits. This is just a list of what I think a man should be. Anyway, I welcome your thoughts…